11/21/2022 (Mon) 08:10
Ashley, whatever you heard about me yesterday. It's not true, not a single word. I can't lie to you so I might as well tell you the truth. I only went to that gay club to meet a guy. I was gonna pay him to show me his big gun in the men's room. I thought guns were easy to come by where you live because of Columbine but that doesn't seem to be the case now. I need a big gun to go down on your happy trail. I don't want to get eaten alive by a cougar. I've already had a few proposition me at Le Peep. I was so afraid to go into that club because it was full of bears. The guy I met at the bar, Shorty, asked me was I ready to see his big gun. I told him I heard it's really impressive. There were so many fags there and I could easily have mistaken this guy for any one of them. I didn't want to get lost in the crowd so we used the buddy system. He took me by the hand and escorted me to the men's room. He pulled out his big gun from his trousers and it was nice. He let me hold it and it was kind of heavy. He asked me was it my first time and I told him it was. I started playing with it in the mirror and blew the tip. It was kind of bent off to one side but I could work with that. Then the guy gave me a fingerbang and we horsed around for a bit. He lit a cigarette and I gave him $20. That's when it all went ham. In walks this twink and they start pissing over the sink. It may have been my face blindness acting up but I swear it was you. I said, "Ashley?" And they replied, "Ashley?? No way, sweetie. It's me, Taz! ...Jesus Christ, is that your big gun?!" Then Taz started jerking my big gun. I tried to put it in my pants but was overcome with homophobia. My only weakness. Then the gun starts going off and Taz yells Jesus Christ! and tosses it out the restroom door onto the dance floor. Taz looked so much like you that I overcame my homophobia when my urge to protect you kicked in and I dived right between Taz's legs. We hit the floor. Next thing you know. Shorty got low. All I heard was gunfire and screaming. I'm sorry Ashley but I think I lost my v-card in the men's room of Club Q. In the chaos, Taz thought they were sucking on their thumb but it wasn't their thumb. I'm getting tested later this week. I want to be positive for you and not for HIV. I'm your crack baby, not your AIDS baby. When the gunfire stopped, all I could hear was Blood on the Dance Floor. That's when Shorty ran out of the restroom. I peered out from the restroom door and there was blood on the dance floor. Taz made a finger gun and slapped my ass saying they'll cover my rear. We walked out trying not to step in the AIDS blood and there was Shorty rubbing his big gun next to some dead trannies. He said our prints were all over this thing. Everyone had shot themselves because they had never been educated on gun safety. The trannies had taken the opportunity suicide. Guns really do kill people. When the police came in the back door, they arrested that guy because he was holding the gun. Taz was given a police cap and hoisted onto the shoulders of some bears and paraded around as a hero for stopping the shooter. I lost $20. Now I wish I had bought you a pizza gift card instead. I hope no one else here will make the same mistake I made. It's not easy being LB.