>>1003
if you're willing to bang that ogress you should make yourself useful:
>get leather clothes and dye your hair black, or just find pics of a handsome goth dude on the internet - it needs to be someone who posts a lot or multiple guys who look fairly similar though, you have to post something like once a day
>go on instagram
>pretend you're in an emo band or something in Denver (if she asks about your shows use the pandemic as an excuse)
>use a fake name and fake info obviously, this is the type who will come to your house and look in your windows
>start complimenting her on all her pics (but without sounding like you care too much)
>see if she DMs you within about a month, otherwise you start the conversation
>channel your inner Chad, but also enable all her mental illness bs, try to bait her into talking about any disagreement she has with Nate and say she's so right and he needs to step it up
>also talk about how some girl broke your heart when you were young and you've had casual romantic encounters all your life but you've never been serious about any other girl and aren't sure you ever could be (that shit is like a magic incantation on dumb women)
>offhandedly imply that you want to meet with her sometime
>???
>take pics, send them all to Nate on facefook as well as screencaps of the instagram convo, DO NOT mention this board or his sister in any way
>they break up and Ash makes a new video to thank us. probably. maybe. probably not idk but it would still be funny.
also, if you don't want to actually fly to Denver and excavate the cavern, just a cap of her agreeing to meet you at a hotel might still do the trick