now Ashley's a retard as all who know know
but even a retard to some things says no
for a tard may enlist if they're duped by a crimp
but what tard makes a boyfriend out of a sad simp?
none! none! none at all! not a retard alive
not a retard who's full or full times one point five
if they've got two brain cells to bounce off of each other
they would sooner go on a date with their brother
for a simp is a simp is a simp you see
and the mightiest simp in the land of the free
well surely you'll know if you've ever seen he
you've seen the simpest simp that you'll ever see be