Back from Dans. Just got the banrock station as I'm only drinking to heal my heart and drown my woe. FRM looked at me as though she could tell I am upset. She notices all the goon boxes as she gives them to the rats for them to nest in. She sometimes joins them together with little holes connecting them. She calls those ones rat hotels. There was a tall girl in front of me with some brown brothers. She smiled at me and did that funny squinty thing girls do. I wanted to talk to her but couldn't bring myself to do so. My mind went blank and I still feel truly awful. She had tall girl posture and a few tattoos. Some inkwork flowers and stuff, the usual shit young women get now. She was of a healthy weight though which is pretty good for a white woman in Munno Para. Whites in this area tend to be exec or have the scary meffed up look. She got carded and I didn't. I was a bit upset about that. Youth fading. She provided her ID, Dan's card and paid, all using her phone. Very impressive stuff. I'm already too old for this shit. I can't wait to be fifty or whatever. I'll be like the old coot in Shawshank Redemption I guess. Not sure what to do for the rest of the night. Feeling woed. Feel very low thumos.