It's funny because I can't stand most people but when other people suffer because of me (particularly my family), it makes me even more miserable. That's the exact opposite of what I intended. I didn't want to be a burden, I wanted to carry the burdens of others, or better yet, alleviate them. But sometimes I can't help but become one myself, there's just no way I can do every thing life demands from me. Even if I can manage it for a while, it's impossible to keep that up for any real span of time. At least for me. A lot of people out there like lizbro work actual jobs and still help their relatives and even strangers on the internet. I can barely stay alive and do some chores. Is that fine? I don't know, I don't really think so, simply because if everyone were like me we'd still be living in the stone age, and I've never been much of an anprim. I haven't been able to improve, but the world doesn't care that I intend to get better or that I want to help, or that I've helped plenty in the past. Well, not so much "the world", the problem lies mostly in society I think. People have their rules and norms and their consensus on what people should be like - they'll treat you better or worse depending on what brand of car you drive, not what sort of values you hold