>>53686
>just vent out how fucked it is, how much a piece of shit you are, how much a piece of shit other people, even people you love are. Disregard how anyone would feel about it, be entirely selfish and entirely self-hating. Once you have the scenario laid bare, you create hypothetical ways "should this be the reality" you would go about living on it, what it takes for you to accept it
Don't we all already do that in a way? Just by navigating through life? Is there really so much about the reality of things that we're missing in that constant, routine process? So many things I'm not seeing about myself and others and the world? It feels like I know what's going on. I don't trust (almost) anyone, I'm not naive about people. I'm not delusional about myself either, I mean I'm the one posting 95% of the self-deprecating humor on this board. But you know what makes me think that you could be right despite all this? The fact that whenever I do try to look inward and find that less apparent stuff, something stops my mind dead in its track. It's like it bounces against a force field or something