>This will be a hard one to answer... So the rage and sadism is the last parts that keep us human. The last "survivor mechanisms". When you get to your "lowest point" 1 last rush of power will awaken and you will be able to fight off many things with that "Last stand". (This energy rush is so powerful extreme spiritual practices make use of it) Also a human evolutionary mechanism. Especially because if you don't use it as a self preservation mechanism but get "drunk" on the feeling you can destroy yourself in the process.
Yes, during these stints, i recall it happening the most in situations where my sisters and I were slaughtering people/creatures, especially the ones threatening to do harm toward us. I recall them taking me out of my body and putting me in a vessel in stasis for what felt like a century, in a (female) body and was a mage but all my memories were gone with knowing how to use magick being the only thing i knew. there was a male (not the same one i talked about before) and he was guiding me around the land. for whatever reason he went psycho on me after discovering i was a mage and proceeded to pursue and kill me. I vividly recall evading his clutches, i dont remember feeling fear per se. However, i felt annoyance and then i heard my sisters' voice "Little sister, remember... what do we do when an obstacle is in our way?" i responded aloud with: "We eliminate them" and they said: "Good little sister". Next thing i know is that i stopped running and confronted the man, after that everything proceeded to go white. I came to and found myself atop the man's chest, seeing his body bloody and beaten, on the verge of death with him laughing and saying i'm not human while didn't feel anything like an emotionless machine. Sometimes i don't think its a human thing, it always felt like a default mode change when i become her/me, unless its something from my sister this whole time.
>while in theory they should be able to manipulate events that ends up killing you in reality there are sort of laws that doesn't let these "energetic influences" happen. What I gathered they sorta made you live some priestess like life and may have convinced you to ascend with a suicide ritual??? What I got that the participants misunderstood how ascension suicide rituals work and your sisters overestimated their ability? I am not good at getting specific events like this. But it is possible that it was a past life event and not a premonition. My "translate the symbolic meanings" ability is not triggering.
I honestly didn't even think i had past lives and just assumed i was completely blank. i do vaguely recall trying to sleep one night and saw red haired priestess, choking me and saying to obey but i'm not sure if that was a past life or during that time i was speaking with that human woman. i do remember getting three rules for them as far death goes
>No suicide unless it's something major (heavy injury, missing a limb, some very bad situation or some illness like cancer)
>as my current self never kill or harm others
>no trooning out of any kind