>>7476
>>they basically gave me that assessment and said that whatever thing they put inside me (they didnt say what it was) is that its going to inevitably bloom inside of me and draw out my true self (im assuming her) whether i like it or not, whether i consciously accelerate it or not
Feels like a dark stone in the form of an egg. It resonates to energy movements. Might increase yours with it. I think "blooming" means there will be an energy circuit "growth" within. Hard to explain what it does. Also I do not think that you are "weak" the problem is that you don't have the fighting spirit within realized therefore you can not draw it out consciously. So if your opponent does not have the intent to kill you but only to spar or mess with you your defensive protocols do not activate. I have something similar but if they have the intention to disrespect me in any way my reflexes activate. Only at higher teachings my battle reflexes stay dormant. Mostly because my yoga reflexes have stuff to do.

>>7474
>(its hard to explain this without it sounding tranny tier, sry)
Don't worry about it. We hate trannies ofc but we all had past lives in different genders and even I have metaphysical organs that resonate with the female organs so I too can say that within my body there is also a female body and other weirdness. It's energetic alchemy. But I will not start taking HRT wear wigs turn myself into an eunuch then suddenly start supporting every madness the globohomo spews. I do not hate trannies because they are trannies but because all the shit they do besides that. I believe in personal freedom but to poison others with dishonest and degenerate ways and being the lowest pawns of the globohomo makes me extremely anti tranny. Especially how widespread that retardation is in the west and they think every media should be filled with their madness.

>i recall getting bullied by some older women due to my original human body, saying i got rid of it due to me not liking my appearance(?) or something but i recall saying it wasn't due to that and it wasn't my true form i think.
>they were oddly satisfied with the answer for some reason
Because "self hate" is never a good reason to change bodies. You didn't "hate yourself" but you want to attain your "true self" with the new body. That is important. The problem with the "isekai" mentality is that people think the "other place other body is definitely better than this" then they give up and stop improving themselves. It results in a defeatist energy formation that do not generate growth at all.
Your task now is to find your "true desire" your "true energies" not just the "I want to be with my sisters" because you have that already but a sort of "I WANT TO LIVE I WANT TO TRIUMPH" dedication a will to prevail mentality.

>>7478
>there is slightly more stuff but im going to have to gather my thoughts and write it out a bit later
Take it easy. I too am in an energetic turmoil and I too am taking it easy. Just found several things and I have an another "I am not sure how things work again" spiritually and energywork wise. I mean I can just go into hyperanalysis mode and the correct mantras manifest that resonate with my true way but srsly. Why are things so weird sometimes. Found a hell dimension with lava crabs and ghosts that can be only repelled via emitting a low vibrational sound like throat singing. It was a realm where the "light of God" has no power (or anything that is high energy in any way. Just makes the ghosts more ferocious). This is why crabs are not kosher at all because if you eat those bottom feeders YHWH have a hard time getting you out of trouble.