>>1033536
>Uncle Clyde shows up at the police station two hours later. "I would' ve been here sooner" he apologizes, "but I was watching a good movie on TV."
>The police officer explains to Uncle Clyde what happened at the mall. You're so embarrassed and ashamed, you wish you could slip through a crack in the floor. Here you are, halfway toward your goal of giving away the million dollars, and you've never felt more miserable."
>The phone rings. "This is probably the manager of the mall," the policeman says. "He's calling to say what the damages came to."
>The policeman talks on the phone for a few minutes. Then he hangs up and turns to you and your uncle. "The damages at the mall come to half a million dollars," he says sternly. He gives you a fierce, angry look.
>"Do you hear that? You have to pay half a million dollars in damages."
>"YAAAAAY!!!" you cry, jumping out of your seat.
>"I'M RICH! I'M RICH!! YAAAAAAAAY!"
>THE END

Wait until the police discover our money is all fake...
But I think that's about as good an ending as we're going to get. We might leave it there.