While such a thing I can to a degree understand the purpose of, it is too far flung a concept to just "do". You of course have the first issue of the difference between actual combat and simulated combat but you have the greater issue of that you chose to engage in a battle that is at best only tangentially related to the battle that truly effects you; that of European Dispossession. You sought purpose in the battle someone else. Such a thing even if executed right is just running from reality. You wouldn't be lauded as a hero or a Man doing the right thing, you'd be a stranger in a strange land seeking purpose where no purpose can be found, not for you, not for a man who has no connection to that land. I would say this issue is exacerbated when you say;

>The only goals now I seem to have in life are saving up for an emergency fund, having a job that allows me to pay the bills, feed myself, and have a decent roof over my head, and to travel. Now the traveling goal isn’t a goal where I pursue in to enjoy myself (going to tourist attractions, staying in hotels, and getting the best selfie shots like all other people you see do and to post their travel pictures on social media), but to go to areas around the world where I can observe and learn how other cultures and societies interact and live their lives, regardless if I have fun or not (as that is not the point).

When I hear travel, I do not think of Europe but world wide which would again be a distraction. It is not the world itself you are disconnected from but yourself, your people. Tell me, and for obvious reasons do not be too specific, from where do you hail? I believe from your use of the term "shopping malls" that you are a far flung son of Europa dwelling within the United States, am I correct? If that is true then I can very much understand your dispossession for the semetic power brokers have made the separation between those of the colonies and the heartlands deliberately vast with their exultation of "new identities" to replace those which such men and women truly belong too. For example, the once differentiation of a man seeking freedom from tyranny and those loyal to a crown have been reduced to "freedum luvin' merican" or "drunken' aussie shitposta". They are no longer Dutch Irish nor English or Scottish for the most part and what little identity most do cling to when mentioning these facets is usually some mild adherence to drinking a particular drink or hating a particular European sub group with the overlay of the new identity grafted over it, a new face that covers the true one at the core of the peoples in question. These new faces though, even with the nations they founded and the soil they enriched as they developed new lands, in their hearts they are still sons of Europe no matter where they be, this fact must be reconciled if a man is to find belonging in this world. His homelands will forever be calling to him no matter how far his feet may take him and no matter how many generations pass.