09/25/2022 (Sun) 15:53
Had a weird dream. Not the habbening themselves, but the feels I had and having as I recall it.
I was in high-school. Not my irl high-school, but it was mine in the dream. I was in highest grade, the 4th, and maybe the year was near the end. I know I had a status and privileges that came not just by the fact that I'm basically outta school, but something more that happened which I did not see in my dream I don't know what it is, I only had the feeling. For this status I could do whatever I wanted, I was free. But for some reason I was bound there, like a haunting ghost.
I was at the very end of a long and wide hallway on the 4th floor. Maybe there were more floors, the building was hueg and kinda modern, gates opened to other hallways (well they were closed, but I knew other hallways running behind them). For some reason that part of the hallway was also separated by a double door, it was open, lower graders were there in a bunch, with big backpacks some placed along the walls, some in the middle, they were talking and busy with school life. Some I knew, at least exchanged couple of words in the past, some of them know me by name, some just by face, but most seemed not to care who I was and if I was there.
I lingered out from that place started along the hallway, most students (all lower graders ofc) have not noticed me at all, and I felt a pang that they should, maybe they should even fear me. Maybe I saw teachers too. The hallways were green-ish, the doors, gates dark brown-ish.
Then I arrived to a central place, an atrium maybe, on my left there was an opening to the actual atrium, a rectangle court in the middle, around each floor had railing, and tiled roof run around. I looked down, students milled about there too. The color orange ruled there, for both the lighting (maybe for the Sun?) and the roofing. I saw my classmates at the other end of the court, they were only five, I had the feeling that we are more, and that only us six remained. I felt warmth towards them but I was proud, happy but also sad.
Where I was on the 4th, there was no railing, and I decided I won't use the stairs to go down but jump down from roof to roof. It was quicker, but it felt as if it was cool to just do that, because I could and not give a shit, if anyone bothers say something. So I did. Noone cared. The disappointment was short, as I walked to my mates. Paradise City from Guns n Roses started to play. Three grills were there, and a bloke. The fifth I'm not sure who was, but I think was also a grill. They were discussing something with heat, but with joy, they had fun. There was one grill with her back to me. Her hair was kinda short, brown, she had sweatshirt on. I approached them and said: "this is our song". I did not mean how like couples mean it, but I knew there was a story behind it, which now irl I do not know. It felt like going home. I walked to the grill with her back to me and hugged her from behind. It was very familiar, intimate and calming. Wasn't sexual, but I think she was more than a classmate or friend.
I woke up.
It is stupid like some American high-shool movie/telly-show, but not really, how it really was to be there, it was different.